Three cheers for the new holder of the Mets franchise single-season record for individual adorableness and stolen bases, Jose Reyes, who stole three bases last night, tying the record with his second and breaking it with his third.

Way to go, Professor.
The All Star Game
August 3, 2007
Jose Reyes, adorable pumpkin and Mets shortstop, was a total, um, star at last night’s All-Star Game. While the National League lost like they have every time in the last 10 years, Reyes “went 3-for-4, stole a base and scored a run while playing longer than any of the other 15 starting position players.” The best part is that I have to guess at what 3-for-4 means. Anyway, you can read the rest of that article here, which is all for the better because MLB.com is gayer for Reyes than I could ever be.
Seriously, they are totally biting my steez in regards to ridiculous sports writing: “As they have every year since 1996, the NL All-Stars tried but couldn’t beat their AL peers. Maybe if they were the NL All-Mets, they would have. The trio of New Yorkers in the NL’s starting lineup stood out like the Golden Gate through a fog blanket, with starters Jose Reyes, Carlos Beltran and David Wright collecting five of the NL’s first six hits.”
Ew, MLB. Grow a pair.